When Is Enough, Enough?

We sat in Nicks car in his driveway in silence.

“Nick. When is enough, enough?” I asked.

He looked at me sadly, “I don’t know Anna. I really am sorry.”

“I just feel like we have these awesome weeks, and then she comes in and ruins it.” I said.

“I know.” He answered, to be honest I wasn’t really expecting it.

“I love you, you know.” He said. “Like I really love you, and I will talk to Millie and tell her this shit can’t happen anymore.”

“I’ve heard this before Nick.” I said a little exasperated.

“I know, I know I have been a real shit.” He said.

“It’s like you…you don’t really care about my reaction to things, you can’t keep everyone happy all the time.” I said.

“Anna, what am I supposed to do?” He asked seriously.

“Think about it Nick, she has a million friends at school and she relies on you to pick her up…I am your girlfriend and you say you love me and yet it always comes back to her.” I said, this is probably the most honest I have ever been with him about Millie.

“I do love you Anna.” He said.

“It doesn’t feel like that Nick, not when we are on the way to pick up your Millie, even after you said this was done. I can’t keep going like this. I just can’t do this…” I said tears springing to my eyes.

“You are the most important person in my life.” He said trying to look at me, but I was too busy trying to get my crying under control looking out of the window.

“Yeah.” Was all I said in response.

“Anna.” Nick said, tugging at my arm to get me to look at him.

“Could you just drop me off home?” I said.

Next think I know, he has pulled out his phone and is dialling someone. I was furious I was a mess and here he was making a bloody phone call.

“Dave. Your sister just called me she needs to be picked up from a Southbar party. Are you free mate?” Nick asked someone who was clearly Millie’s brother.

I heard the guy on the other side of the phone, “Ah man…I am sorry she’s still doing this shit.”

They talked for a little while longer, Nick gave the address and messaged Millie telling her that her brother was picking her up.

I sat there in silence watching Nick organise everything.

 “Do you want me to take you home?” He asked.

I just shook my head in his response, we had too much to talk about.

“Anna. I am sorry. I…god I love you and I have been a dick. You are it Anna, I have given Millie so 

much of everything the last year, you are not something I am willing to sacrifice.”

“I don’t know what to say.” I said.

“You don’t have to say anything. This is how it’s going to be, I promise.” He said reassuring me.

Hoes Over Bros

*Sorry for my Wednesday! I will upload one on Sunday to make up for it..But there's a longer post to make up for it! :)

It was Friday night and Marie and I decided to go to the movies. We’d had a reasonably mundane week, which was nice after such a full on Monday. Nick and I as expected hadn’t had a minute alone to talk or do anything else for that matter. 

“We haven’t hung out alone of ages.” I said to Marie.

“I know, we need to ditch those boys more often.” Marie said winking at me and inhaling some popcorn. We were in the cinema waiting for the trailers to start, the cinema was pretty empty seeing as it was a Friday night and there wasn’t much else to do in this little town.

“I have to tell you something.” I started, I still hadn’t told her about Nick and I and it had been nearly a week.

“What?” Marie shot her head towards me, her eyes were wide.

“Nick and I had sex on Monday.” I said quietly not wanting anyone to hear.

“WHAT?” She practically yelled, a few people turned around and looked at her. I smiled at her response.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” She had managed to lower her voice.

“I just wasn’t ready, it was kind of nice having something that only Nick and I knew about.” I said honestly.

“Well how was it?” She said with a big smile.

“I…it hurt a bit, but it was really nice. He was…so sweet and I don’t know I’m glad it’s happened.” I said.

“I’m glad you are happy. I knew you guys were acting differently on Monday.” She smiled.

“There’s more.” I said smiling.

“More?” Marie laughed.

“After all of that, he told me he loved me.” I said smiling.

“Oh my god, you have really had a big bloody week Anna.” She said smiling.

“Yeah.” I said smiling.

“I’m happy for you friend.” Marie said smiling at me genuinely.

Then the movie trailers started, we laughed and laughed it was a fantastic movie. I hadn’t actually seen a movie so good for ages. We walked out of the cinema with tears streaming down our face from laughter.

Marie had driven me but Nick was picking me up, Marie and I had a quick hug and she hoped into her car. 

Nick arrived soon after Marie left, “You haven’t been waiting for too long have you?” Nick said as I got into his passenger seat.

“No.” I said giving him a quick kiss on the cheek.

“Good, sorry I was reading with Mickey I didn’t even realise.” He said.

“That’s ok.” I said and he reached for my hand.

“How is it at home?” I asked him.

“Good, good; everyone is in bed so will have some alone time.” He smiled.

I kissed him again and we sat in comfortable silence until his phone started ringing loudly.

“Can you see who that is babe?” He said. I grabbed his phone from the centre compartment, only to 

be confronted my Millie’s name flashing up on his screen.

“It’s Millie.” I said flashing his screen at him.

“Oh.” He said scratching the back of his neck, “It’s ok just silence it.”

I did as I was told and threw his phone back into the compartment. It rang again as we pulled into his driveway, again Nick just ignored it.

We went into his room and I immediately kicked off my shoes and crawled into bed, it was freezing, Nick put on the episode of Chicago Fire we were up too. Nick got in next to me and I cuddled up to him close, trying to warm my feet up on him. We didn’t last long just lying there, before I knew it I was on top of him and we were making out. Nicks hands were tentatively lifting up my shirt. I on the other was not as patient as him, I took my lips from his, I grabbed the bottom of his shirt and I practically ripped it off his body. Nick just chuckled. I took this opportunity to undo his jeans, Nick shuffled them off his body and I appreciated the view before me. God he was way too hot.

“Anna, we have to be quiet ok?” Nick whispered in my ear and rolled on top of me, as he gently kissed me from my ear to my neck, before he slowly started undressing me. I was in a little tank top and jeans, it wasn’t long before I was just in my bra and underwear Nick and I were practically panting. Nick was leaving kisses down my neck, I sat up and he had no choice to follow my lead; Nick looked surprised but I snapped off my bra and he urgently met my lips, just then his phone started ringing again. It didn’t take me very long to work out it was Millie. Nick to his credit did not stop kissing me, he didn’t even falter. I on the other hand did. My lips stopped moving.

“Anna, its ok.” He said, latching his mouth to my breast as the phone stopped ringing. I let him kiss me again, I nearly forgot about her, forgot the fact that a year ago she was probably in this position and I was the one annoyingly ringing Nick. And then his phone rang again.

“Answer the fucking phone Nick.” I said pushing him off me.

“Anna.” Nick said sitting up next to me.

“Answer it.” I said leaning across him, grabbing his phone and handing it to him.

He sighed at me before saying, “Yes Millie.”

“Nick.” I heard Millie bellow through the phone.

“What do you need Millie?” He said quietly, at this point I grabbed my bra from the bed head and 

slipped it over my shoulders. Nick shook his head at me and grabbed my hand pulling my bra down with it. I couldn’t help it I smiled at him.

“I need you to come get me Nick.” I heard her say, she was clearly at a party there was music in the background. I rolled my eyes at him and grabbed my t-shirt and slipped it over my head.

“Millie I can’t I’m busy.” He said watching me collect my clothes that were scattered through his room.

I didn’t hear what she said but Nick’s response was, “Millie I can’t just come and pick you up I’m busy.”

“What are you talking about?” Nick asked, his eyes were wide with something I didn’t recognise.

“Your brother would pick you up if you messaged him.” He was exasperated, I sat next to him on the bed.

“I’ll call you back.” He said and he hung up on her. I knew what that meant.

He turned to me, “Apparently she needs to pick her up from a party.”

“I got that.” I replied I was looking towards his bedroom door.

“What do I do?” He asked.

“Go get her Nick. If you feel like you have too, just go.” I said exasperated.

“She said she’s scared, she at a Southbar party.” He said, I was grateful he wasn’t saying her name to me. Southbar was a school about half an hour away, it was known as a bit of a rough school.

“Well Nick what are you going to do?” I asked.

“Come with me?” He asked hopefully.

“Ok.” I said, I wanted to make it clear to Millie that Nick and I were strong. Even if at the moment I felt pretty worthless.

“Are you serious?” He asked clearly shocked.

“I said I would go, lets go.” I said standing up. Nick quickly ran around his room and put on is clothes.

“I’m really sorry Anna.” He said leaning in for a kiss, I quickly moved my face so he kissed my cheek. I walked towards his bedroom door.

“Anna, please.” He practically begged.

“Let’s just go Nick.” I said turning back briefly to meet his eyes.

Secret Squirrel Business

Nick and I decided to make a nice breakfast, I was in charge of the toast and scrambled eggs, and 

Nick took control of the bacon and tomatoes.

“How are you feeling?” Nick asked me, when we were making breakfast.

“Yeah I am good.” I said leaning into his chest and he kissed my forehead.

“I’m not ready to not be alone with you though.” I said smiling up to him.

“I know, my parents will probably go away soon or maybe we can go away to the beach in a couple of weeks after exams.” He suggested.

“Yeah that would be nice.” I said turning around and dishing up the eggs.

“Anna are you sure you are ok?” Nick asked me, scratching the back of his neck.

“Nick…I am fine. It was perfect.” I said honestly, he smiled in response.

“I love you, you know.” He said, it was the first time either one of us had said it, I was definitely feeling it but I hadn’t quiet worked up the courage to say it to him yet.

I took a step closer to him, I was a little bit surprised I suppose I shouldn’t have been, I had known for a long time that I was in love with him too. Looking at him now there was no doubt in my mind, he had a small blush on his cheeks, and he was alternating between looking in my eyes and to the floor. I reached up and put my hand on his cheek.

“I love you too Nick.” I said smiling at him and pulling his face gently towards mine and we kissed. Goodness me this was a big day in our relationship.

Nick and I turned our attention back to breakfast and before too long Will and Marie arrived so we could all drive to school together.

“Hello.” Marie called from the front door.

“We are in the kitchen.” I called out, I got two extra plates and scraped together some left overs for the both of them.

“Ooo yum.” Will said gratefully taking the plate that I held out for him.

He took a seat at the table next to Nick, “How’d you sleep Nicky boy?”

“Yeah man, pretty good.” He replied, they spoke easily while I got Marie’s plate of food ready and we sat down opposite the boys, I caught Nick’s eyes a few times and we both smiled at each other constantly. It was nice having a secret no-one else knew, even if it was just for little while.

Nick and Will cleaned up while I finished getting ready for school, Marie just watched me adding a few curls to my hair to finish off the messy look.

“What’s going on with you and Nick?” Marie asked looking up from a magazine she was reading.

“Whatever do you mean Marie?” I said sucking my cheeks in and adding a bit more blush.

“Something is going on with you two. You guys are acting a bit different.” She said watching me closely for reaction.

“Nothing’s going on.” I said. Marie opened her mouth to say something back to me but Will interrupted.

“HURRY UP GUYS, WE ARE GOING TO BE LATE.” Will called out from the front door.

“Ok we are coming.” I called out after them.